We’ve all been there—trapped in a conversation with someone who just can’t stop talking about themselves. You share a story, and before you know it, they’ve hijacked it with their own (usually more impressive) tale. Dealing with a conversational narcissist can feel draining and frustrating, but learning how to navigate these situations can save your sanity.

What Is a Conversational Narcissist? 🤔

A conversational narcissist is someone who constantly shifts the conversation back to themselves, rarely showing genuine interest in others. It’s not always intentional—sometimes it stems from a need for validation or a lack of self-awareness.

Common Signs of a Conversational Narcissist:

1. Constant Self-Reference: They relate everything back to their own experiences.

2. One-Upping: No matter your story, they have a "better" one.

3. Minimal Listening: They nod along without truly engaging.

4. Story Hijacking: They cut you off to insert their narrative.

5. Lack of Follow-Up Questions: They rarely inquire about your perspective or feelings.

Example:

Imagine you’re sharing a story about a recent vacation, describing how you finally conquered your fear of heights by going zip-lining. Just as you’re getting to the exciting part, your friend interjects:

"Oh wow, that’s nothing! Last year, I went skydiving from 15,000 feet, and it was way scarier!"

Suddenly, the conversation is all about their skydiving adventure while your story is left hanging. You’re left feeling invisible and unimportant.

How to Deal with Conversational Narcissists 🗣️

1. Set Gentle Boundaries

Don’t hesitate to steer the conversation back to your point.

• Example: "That sounds incredible! I’d love to hear more after I finish my story about zip-lining."
   

2. Use Reflective Listening

Acknowledge their story before redirecting.

• Example: "That sounds like a thrilling experience! Speaking of overcoming fears, I felt so proud of myself during the zip-lining trip."
   

3. Limit Your Emotional Investment

Understand that it’s not about you—it’s their need for attention. Keep your emotional distance and don’t take it personally.
 

4. Redirect the Focus

If they continuously steer the conversation back to themselves, ask open-ended questions to involve others.

• Example: "That’s interesting! Has anyone else tried something adventurous like that?"
   

5. Know When to Step Back

Sometimes, the best way to preserve your energy is to minimize interactions with chronic conversational narcissists. Prioritize spending time with people who respect and value your thoughts.

Why Do They Act This Way?

Conversational narcissism often stems from low self-esteem, insecurity, or an intense need for validation. Understanding this doesn’t excuse the behavior, but can help you respond with compassion rather than frustration.

The Power of Self-Awareness

It’s worth reflecting on your own communication style too. Sometimes, without realizing it, we might exhibit similar tendencies. Practice active listening, ask open-ended questions, and make space for others to share.

Learning to deal with conversational narcissists can be challenging, but with patience and the right approach, you can maintain your peace while keeping conversations balanced. Remember, it’s not your responsibility to fix them—but you can protect your energy and boundaries.